Teacher:Prove tht things compress wid cold & expand wid heat.Student:Sir, garmiyo ki chuttiya 45 hoti hai aur sardiyo me sikud ke 7 reh jati

CIRCUIT: Bhai, Bapu ne bola tha ke kabhi jhoot nehin bolna mangta hai. Apun aaj se kabhi jhoot nehin bolega Bhai. MUNNA BHAI: Aye Circuit, woh Sunita ka baap aya hai terayko dund rehla hai. CIRCUIT: Bhai usko bolo apun gaon gaya hai, kheti karneko. MUNNA BHAI: Par Circuit, abhi to tu bola kabhi jhoot nehin bolega. CIRCUIT: Bhai, apun jhoot nehin bolega, par tum to bol sakta hai na.

Wife:Apko pata hai mr.R apni patni ko kiss karke hi office jate hai,lekin apne kabhi ki. Husband:Chahta to mein bhi hu,lekin mr.R ki biwi nahi manegi.

Patni:Mei jab gaana gaati hoon toh aap balcony mei kyo chale jate ho Pati:kahi muhalle wale aisa na samjhe mei tumara gala daba raha hoon.

"Maathe pe lahu,sir pe ret..Wah!Wah! Jara Gaur karna.Mathe pe lahu,sir pe ret. Kyonki PADOSAN ne phool mara. 'GAMLE SAMET."

Sir, kal raat Qaidiyo ne jail me Ramayan ki thi! Jailor : Isme itne hairan kyo ho? Sir,Hanuman bna Qaidi abhi tak sanjivni leker lauta nahi!

papu:papa aapki luv marrige hui thi na baap:tumko kaise pata papu:wo aap ki shadi or meri date of birth me sirf 4 months ka farq hai…

BOY: Wud u mind dancing with me? GIRL: Sorry, main bache ke saath nahi nachti. BOY: Oh sorry mujhe pata nahi tha ki aap PREGNANT hai ok u enjoy.......!

1aurat jyotish k pas jakar hath dikhati heJytsh:Aap 3mahine me vidhva ho jayogi Aurat:Ye mujhe bi pata he ye batao pakdi jaaungi ya nahi

What do you call a female who never laughs? "HASINA"

1 Admi Apni biwi se bola-Raja dashrath ki 3 raniya thi.Is hisab se main 2 shadian or kr sakta hu.Biwi-Bas itna yad rakhna k Dropdi k 5 pati bhi they.

Buddha Principal se:Zara BANTI ko bulado Principal:Aap kaon?Buddha:Uska dada Principal:Wo chhutti leker aapki MAYYAT me gaya hai.