In aptitude test…River Kaveri is in which state? SaNTA: liquid state.

Before taking capsules banta cuts both ends of the capsules.Do u know why? To avoid side effects......

Once a Sardar was walking & had a glove on 1 hand & not on other so a man asked him why did he do so. He Replied dat d weather forecast announced dat on 1 hand it wud be cold & on d other hand it would be hot.

Santa Singh hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of his index finger shot off. 'How did this happen?' the emergency room doctor asked him. 'well, I was trying to commit suicide,' Santa replied. 'What?' sputtered the doctor. 'You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?' 'No! No! No! I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger.'

Interviewer:what is skeleton? Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person who started dieting but forgot to stop it..

Santa Singh : 'Look Banta, what type of glasses they have made. The top is closed. How can you fill lassi in it ?' Banta Singh : 'Yes, that's funny. And even if you make a hole at the top, how will the lassi stay in the glass when the bottom is open?'

Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.

Santa always study in front of a mirror because of 3 reasons:1. It helps saving revision time.2. He can keep a watch on himself.3. He likes combined studies

SaNTA My mobile bill how much? Centre girl: Just dial 123 to know ur current bill. SANTA Stupid,not current bill My mobile bill..

SANTA enters kitchen, opens sugar container, looks inside and closes it. He does this again and again. Why?Because his Doctor told him to check sugar level regularly.

Q: Why Santa is standing below the Tube light with an open mouth. A: Because Doctor has advised him: ‘Aaj Light Khana hai!’

Santa rail mein susu karne gaya, vapis aane par wife aapka pajama gila kaise hua? santa vaha likha tha,sharir ka koi bhi angh bahar na nikale.