Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."

Teacher : If u have 12 chocolates u gv 5 to Leena,3 to Tina,4 to Meena, den what wil u get? Student: 3 NEW GIRLFRIENDS

Teacher: pappu, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. pappu: Me!

Do you believe that getting married on a Friday brings bad luck ? "Of course, why would Friday be an exception?"

Mr.bean said to his GirlFriend"I luv u"& fell down. Again Told"I luv u"&fell down.Girl: y u r doing like this? Mr.bean: I am falling in love

Honey, when we get married, I'll be there to share all your troubles and sorrows." "But I don't have any, my love." "I said, when we get married"

da cocktail party 1 woman said to another "Aren't u wearing ur wedding ring on da wrong finger?" The other replied "Yes, I am, I married da wrong man."

A teacher was asking her class what their fathers did. When she asked young Johnny, he said, "My father's dead, Miss." "Oh, I am sorry, Johnny. In that case, what did he do before he died?" "He went blue and collapsed."

Sir:Can ppl tell the future with cards?Sam:My mom can.Sir:Really?Sam:1 look at my report card n she wll tel me wot happens whn dad gets home

Lady2Doc:let my husband come inside.Doctor:Trust me,I am a Gentleman.Lady:I know,but Nurse is sitting outside &my husband is not A gentleMan

Santa Banta find a bomb Santa and Banta find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the police station. "What if one of them explodes before we get there?" asks Banta. "Don’t worry about it," says Santa. "We’ll just lie and tell them we only found two."

Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire? Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.