Banta: Name the 3 fastest means of communication. Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman.

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

A friend asks SANTA how was ur exam? SANTA: It was ok but i couldn't answer past tense of THINK. I thought, thought & finally i wrote 'THUNK'.

How did santa tried to kill a bird?? He took it to the top of a building and dropped it from there to die.

Santa got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket. He gave Rs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool. I have pass.

Santa to nurse-I luv u tumne mera dil chura liya hai,Nurse-Chal jhutha humne to sirf kidney churayi hai dil ko to hath bhi nahi lagaya…

Santa always study in front of a mirror because of 3 reasons:1. It helps saving revision time.2. He can keep a watch on himself.3. He likes combined studies

Santa, where's your homework?" the teacher said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand. "My dog ate it," was his solemn response. "Santa, I've been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me to believe that?" "It's true, Miss, I swear," insisted the boy. "I had to force him, but he ate it!"

A man to Santa: Ur friend is kissing ur wife in ur home. Santa rushes home and came back within half an hour n slapped the man n said: He's not my friend.

santa ki maa: Puttar tujhe yahan se jalandhar jane me to ek din laga par wapas aane me 3 din lag gae wo bhi nai car se? santa: Maa yeh car banane wale bhi pagal hai jane ke liye to 4 gear dete hai par aane ke liye 1 hi gear dete hai.

santa- Raat muje ek aadmi ne chaku dikhakar loot liya. Friend- Lekin tere paasto hamesha gun hoti hai. santa - wo meine chupa di thi, varna wo bhi chori ho jati…

Santa meets his old friend. Santa: A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B. Friend: Oye, iska matlab? Santa: Kuch nahin yaar, I mean long time no C.